I am a happy man so I feel comfortable giving
relationship advice men can count on. Men experience significant
changes in life on the road to greater relationships, responsibility,
and maturity. We learn that powerful emotions exist beyond the bedroom.
With hearts like ancient warriors, men drunk on bravado and
independence had yet to earn their sensitive stripes. Men know power,
prestige, and authority - not tenderness, compassion, and "humble
pie". As we get older, the things that bring tears to our eyes become
the ones that help us grow.
A Word on Commitment
Commitment
means more than "showing up" for a relationship. It means being there
when it matters most, when times are tough and your partner needs a
reassuring hug or a kind word of encouragement. It means building
bridges to a greater sense of security, counting on that person to be
around for more than just physical affection. This is where lovers
become friends, the opposite of what we might expect. Do not discount
the power of simple conversation to make people feel more connected,
more secure, more in tune with you.
Personal Space
Personal
space is a huge issue for people in relationships. As a man, you will
want yours, so you need to respect that she also needs hers. Your
partner may have friends and family she has relied on for emotional
support, relationship advice, and companionship. These are people she
has known for years. They are a part of who she is, and a mutual
respect of this social breathing room will cement a sense of
appreciation between you. Respect not only her, but also the people,
places, and things that make her who she is.
Interests and Hobbies
Interests
and hobbies play a part in successful relationships. The two of you may
not have many, but they can be very different from each other. For
example, your idea of relaxing may be to watch the game on TV, while
her idea of a relaxing time is taking the dog on a nature walk. You
may like loud music, while she prefers a quiet evening with a good
book. She may be the kind of person who likes the arts, while you
could care less about musicals and plays. You need to recognize that
both of your interests and hobbies are important. In a successful
relationship, you must learn the art of dancing through conflict and compromise, not fighting through
it. You must find common ground and learn to appreciate something
about the things you are not really into. The benefits of having a
happy significant other are worth trying something different. You may
find that you like it.
Final Word
In a nutshell, this is relationship advice men can count on:
Be patient. with yourself and with her. Love and happiness is like a gravel road - the more you tread its surface, the smoother it becomes.
Look for signals
. Pay attention to visual clues, body language, not what she says, but
how she says it. You will soon gain an intuition as to how she is
feeling, and what you can do to either turn it around or let it shine
like the sun.
Learn to let go. Do not
smother her or try to force your way as the only way. Growing into each
other is the slow and steady course to staying together.
Money is not everything.
Money is just the most common point of contention in a relationship...
Where it comes from, where it goes, why is there not enough. Despite
the rumor, money cannot fix relationships so do not expect it to.
Little things mean a lot.
It does not have to be a diamond ring. A card, a flower, a kiss, a bit
of free verse, a special trip on the way home. If you are creative,
you can bring her closer than ever before.
Monte Jamison, Founder
PickMySpouse
CommonSenseNation
© 2009
